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In this episode you’ll learn:
- Why Michael persisted to publish a book he believed in
- How power and control work in relationships
- What the drama triangle is and the importance of triggers
- How Michael built a team to carry him across the line
- How the coaching habit will help you to create great work
Michael Bungay Stanier’s new book, The Coaching Habit: Say Less, Ask More and Change The Way You Lead Forever, almost got abandoned.
It’s taken Michael three years, four false starts, and a decision to fire his agent to complete.
Yet having reconnected with his vision, remembering who he was writing for, he found himself back on track.
Michael shares his struggles and triumphs whilst revealing his own insights gained writing the book.
Hear how Michael and the Box of Crayons team self-published The Coaching Habit to great acclaim.
You’ll also hear how the 7 questions in this book could mean working less hard and having more impact.
“The nice thing about writing three or four bad versions of a book is that you start to see what the good version could actually be like” – Michael Bungay Stanier
Items mentioned in this episode (quick access):
Unlocking your own potential
[00:42] Introducing Michael Bungay Stanier and his new book, The Coaching Habit.
[01:47] Who The Coaching Habit is for and what problem it is solving.
[03:12] Michael offers a definition of coaching.
[05:20] Why Michael believes people are so quick to offer advice.
[06:02] Understanding what control is.
Prizes and punishments
[08:02] Mark Bowden. Starting small.
[09:15] What happens when you empower somebody.
[10:45] Michael shares the challenges he had writing The Coaching Habit.
[13:00] How Michael’s first four books were relatively easy to write.
[13:20] Steal Like an Artist by Austin Kleon and Rework by Jason Fried.
“If you can focus you’ll often have more success” – Michael Bungay Stanier
Misery, misery, misery, fantastic
[15:45] Hiring great people and building a team around the book.
[17:16] When Michael reconnected with his vision.
[17:48] Seth Godin’s book, The Dip.
[18:47] Intrinsic and extrinsic motivation.
“What’s the least I could teach here that would be the most useful?” – Michael Bungay Stanier
Say less, ask more great questions
[19:05] Finding great questions.
[19:35] What elegance means to Michael.
[19:50] My one best question.
[21:00] The toughest question to ask: the foundation question.
[21:40] Peter Block’s book, Flawless Consulting.
The drama triangle
[25:00] Stephen Karpman.
[29:30] All models are wrong but some are useful.
[29:58] How awareness helps.
[30:26] Charles Duhigg and his book, The Power of Habit.
[32:15] Building a new habit in less than 60 seconds.
[32:50] The focus question.
Leading with curiosity
[34:09] How The Coaching Habit helps managers.
[36:15] Coaching as a way of being.
[37:22] Leading with curiosity.
[38:56] Michael shares his most inspirational moment writing his book.
[40:18] Working with Seth Godin’s editor, Catherine Oliver.
[40:55] Why you need to trust professionals.
“Coaching…is a tool everyone can use” – Michael Bungay Stanier
Professional self publishing
[42:14] The story behind Box of Crayons Press.
[43:23] Self-publishing versus traditional publishing.
[45:02] What’s best for Michael and Box of Crayons.
[46:17] Executive Coaching With Backbone and Heart by Mary-Beth O’Neill
[47:23] Where you can connect with Michael and find his book.
Links:
If you enjoyed this podcast, you’ll also like:
- How To Gain Respect and Create Greater Impact By Saying Less and Asking More (with Michael Bungay Stanier)
- Michael Bungay Stanier on Building Lasting Habits (in less than 60 seconds)
- How To Focus On The Work That Matters
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